30 Ways to Build Confidence

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Confidence helps us feel ready for life’s experiences. When we’re confident, we’re more likely to move forward with people and opportunities — not back away from them. And if things don’t work out at first, confidence helps us try again. It’s the opposite when confidence is low.

Some say that self-confidence is like a muscle – you have to keep exercising it to make it strong and powerful. Self-confidence is one of those wonderful skills that can actually be learned by practicing a few mindset tricks and techniques, which means that no one can stop you from becoming confident

Why confidence is key to success

If you are confident you will have high self-esteem, self-respect, and belief in yourself. If you develop self-confidence consciously, you will take opportunities that come your way and have the strength to overcome obstacles.

High self-confidence is the key to leading a happy life. Confidence reflects upon your well-being, level of satisfaction, and peace. Confidence also allows you to speak concisely and with clarity. Confident professionals communicate with confidence and can convey what they want in a clear and efficient manner. This leads to success which in turn boosts confidence. Since success is the biggest booster dose for higher self-confidence. 

Signs of  low self-confidence

  1. If you say negative things or are critical of yourself.
  2. You jokingly say negative about yourself.
  3. You focus more on your negative points and ignore achievements.
  4. You blame yourself more for unfavorable results.
  5. You think others are better.
  6. You think you don’t deserve enjoyable moments.
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What causes low self-confidence?

The main culprit of low self-confidence among adults is an ongoing stressful job, relationship breakdown, and financial troubles. Other culprit includes being in an abusive relationship or poor treatment from a parent or carer. Chronic medical conditions such as headache, life-threatening illness, and physical disability.

Can self-confidence be taught?

  1. Confidence is not something that can be taught quickly with some quick fixes. Confidence is in fact a state of mind. Positive acts, practice, and deep conversations with other people are all useful to boost your confidence levels. 
  1. Nobody is born confident. However, confidence is something you develop as you live your life and put yourself in new environments. When you see others who ooze with confidence don’t assume they are born with it.
  1. Though confidence comes from the inside. It’s actually a choice. If you are confident you believe in yourself first, before anyone else, and are persistent with that belief even if you struggle. 

One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation. Arthur Ashe 

What are strategies to build self-confidence?

  1. Know what you’re good at and just do it. Confidence is built on past accomplishments. If you achieve your goals, you are going to feel good about yourself. It achieves your day-to-day goals, every day, chances are you will meet your weekly and monthly goals, which helps you achieve your bi-annual and annual goals. You need to keep in mind that progress does not happen overnight. Your past long-term success of health and wealth will bring you happiness and build self-confidence for the future. 
  2. Build positive relationships. Listening and decoding what others communicate to you is the most important part of building a positive relationship. When someone tries to communicate with you, they do so to fulfill their need to make you understand. A positive relationship brings good feelings and it brings confidence.  
  3. Be kind to yourself. It is important to be kind to others, but it’s more important to practice self-kindness. Self-kindness shows you accept yourself for growth. Self-kindness promotes happiness and self-confidence since if you treat yourself kindly others will treat you the same and that builds confidence in yourself. 
  4. Learn to be assertive. If you are assertive you feel confident about your opinions and beliefs.  It’s not good to insult or degrade another person’s opinions. Someone may feel strongly about a particular political view; If you are assertive you can disagree and share your opinions about the same issue without insulting others.
  5. Start saying “no”. It’s important for you to feel empowered while still maintaining good relationships with others. Saying no helps you build healthy boundaries that enable others to understand what to expect from you.
  6. Give yourself a challenge. Challenging yourself means you decide to take on new tasks. Since we need to try to do more work to improve ourselves. Even studies found that challenging self is an important way to improve and build confidence.
  7. Use positive affirmations correctly. If you want to start to make less room for negative thoughts, you have to intentionally practice positive thoughts. 
  8. Identify your competencies and develop them. Knowing your own strengths and finding ways to maintain and improve them will build confidence. You have good leadership skills, you need to try to involve with many different groups and increase that skill in different dimensions.
  9. Learn to accept compliments. Most people have trouble accepting compliments since it’s tied to social anxiety. Another reason is going through life without experiencing positive feelings of gratitude. 
  10. Eliminate self-criticism and introduce self-compassion
  11. Think positive. Focus on the good things of life and practice gratitude. 
  12. Volunteer for different causes and activities. Volunteering provides you an opportunity to give back to the community and make difference and also provides you an opportunity to develop a new skill or build knowledgebase. With new skills or doing good, you know more people and build leadership skills that build your confidence levels. 
  13. Try to visualize your success. Seeing yourself succeed will build confidence since visualizing success is a great way to teach your mind to believe in yourself. 
  14. Believe In Yourself. Believing in self means having confidence in our own capabilities. It means believing that you yourself CAN achieve your potential.
  15. Gather The Courage.  It means to force yourself to be brave enough to do things you are frightened or worried about it. e.g Courage to ask him to marry her
  16. Be Optimistic. If you have an optimistic outlook towards the life you in general are confident. In order to be optimistic, you need to have a positive outlook on life. 
  17. Learn to be fine with social discomfort. Negative experiences create social discomfort. Childrens who experience teasing, bullying, ridicule or humiliation may be more prone to social anxiety disorder. Asking your support system is a good way to learn to handle social discomfort. 
  18. Improve your appearance. If you decide that part of your plan to improve your appearance is to exercise more, hydrate and practicie good posture. If you dress well you not only look better, you create a feedback loop in which other people continually affirm that you look good. This makes you feel even better, which boosts your confidence.
  19. Replace jealousy with appreciation. Jealousy stems from inferiority complex. Everyone has an inferiority complex. If you think someone doesn’t have one, you don’t know him or her well enough. In order to replace it to appreciation focus on goodness of your own life. 
  20. Treat yourself well. Treating yourself well and others is proven to boost happiness, health and well-being. When you performs a good deed, those around you are more likely to follow it and it boosts confidence about yourself.
  21. Lead an activelifestyle. If you are active life by doing regular exercise and participate in community activities you are less likely to suffer from illness and depression. Active lifestyle boost your confidence and help you lead happy life.  
  22. Be self-contained. Being self sufficient is not easy but it can make you strong and independent. 
  23. Establish a purpose.Living a purposeful life gives you energy to do achieve your goals. That gives you confidence to lead a successful life.  
  24. Use hopeful statements. Treat yourself with kindness and encouragement
  25. Forgive yourself. Forgiveness is important to the heal your sould. It allows you to let go of the anger, shame, sadness, or any other feeling you may be experiencing, and move on. Once you know how you  feeling, give it a voice and accept that mistakes are inevitable.
  26. Avoid ‘should’ and ‘must’ statements. Should and “must” statements are a common negative thinking words, that can contribute to feelings of fear and worry.
  27. Focus on the positive. Positive thinking is key when you experience bad situations. Positive thinking often starts with positive self-talk. 
  28. Reflect on what you’ve learned. Reflective learning is a way of allowing learners to take a step back and reflect on what is learned giving new perspective to it that helps them to develop critical thinking skills and, improve on future performance.  
  29. Relabel upsetting thoughts. You don’t have to react negatively to negative thoughts. Try to find positve and new things to learn from the experience. 
  30. Encourage yourself. Self-encouragement is believing in yourself and in your ability to overcome your limitations and handicaps. By self encouraging you believe in your own abilities and learn to move forward fromo the negativities of your failures. Since in the success is all matters no matter how many failures you endured. 
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The key to self-confidence is acceptance. Accept who you are; and revel yourself. Don’t be satisfied with past success or failures move on do more and act. Since success is key to life and confidence is key to success. So never underestimate challenges. They may sometime break your confidence but having faith in your own abilities will allow you to spring back. 

By John Gurung

A former software developer who is now a blogging enthusiast. A true digital nomad.

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